gag me with a spoon!

a few months ago, i was out to dinner with "vhat" and we were discussing commercials. that conversation was the inspiration for this post, even if it has taken me several months to finally sit down and type out my thoughts. anyway, here goes.....


in the business world, advertising is everything. the right (or wrong) words can either make a product seem ultra appealing or disgusting. a great example of the former are the iPod commercials. even though i am currently at war with Apple over their iTunes 5.0 fiasco, i still have to give them snaps for doing a great job of showing off how cool their product is. or even better.... how cool you can be once you buy it!

i know that i look this cool.. and skinny.. when i listen to Metric on my iPod!

now let's look at another company with one of the most disgusting advertising campaigns around. i'll give you a hint... it has to do with fingernails.

no, i'm not talking about Country Crock. you know, the creepy hands that caress the tub of lard, while you hear voiceovers done by a couple that probably work as dj's on your local "soft rock" radio station.

i also don't mean the old commercial with the fingernail that bends back and breaks while opening the pull-tab on a can of pop.

the most disgusting commercial award goes to.......

L A M I S I L !

i swear, it pains me to even look at this picture posted above. i remember the first time that i saw this commercial... i actually yelled out loud and had to close my eyes. from then on, everytime that i saw either that foot or "digger" (yes, that's right, that germ thing actually has a name!), i had to quickly change the channel.

i don't know what kind of crack the advertising exec was on when approving this one. however, if you think about it, they really did get the job done. i know that i won't ever forget this commercial. if, God forbid, i ever get some unidentified toe fungi, i'm sure that i'll be hoofin' (or limpin') it to the nearest drugstore to buy some Lamisil to rid my foot of the little "diggers"!

however, it doesn't change the fact that this commercial is immensely disturbing and gross. i shutter at just the memory of seeing that toenail pull back. yuck!

for your enjoyment, i thought that i would include a few more pictures that i found for lamisil. i'm sure that even the japanese and spanish audiences retch at the site of "digger"!

Lamisil has even thought of your gift-giving needs this Christmas season.

i can't imagine why this didn't make oprah's favorites list this year!

things that make you go hhmmmmmm??????

to close... a bit of advice for my loyal readers...

WASH YOUR FEET PEOPLE!

(listening to "Oh Sweetheart" by the Shout Out Louds)

what's a recorder?

ahhhh.... technology.... i love it! i especially love my sidekick 2. i swear, it's hard for me to remember how i managed to live so long without it. to have information at my fingertips is fantastic.
for example, take into account a recent trip to see Tegan & Sara at the Social with some of my friends last weekend. my dear friend Stephanie, has a twin brother, and when i said that everyone has a "twin" she said, "yes, a doppelganger!" wha? i had never heard of such a word before. surely she must have made it up! however, it was only a few short moments from when i searched, before my trusty sidekick 2 had the answer for me.

(in case you are interested... dictionary.com gives this definition)

dop·pel·gäng·er or dop·pel·gang·er ( P ) Pronunciation Key (dpl-gngr, -gng-)n.
A ghostly double of a living person, especially one that haunts its fleshly counterpart.


interesting how you can learn something new everyday, even when just hanging out in between sets at a concert.

shortly after the vocabulary lesson, i mentioned how a song we were listening to sounded like it had a recorder playing in it. james, a cool new friend, totally agreed, and didn't even make fun of me as i began playing my "air recorder"! on the other hand, stephanie wasn't sure what we were talking about.

(enter my sidekick 2)

click click click......" aaaahhhhhhh!!!!!! ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! look what google images pulled up!!!!"

"Maddox Jolie" recorder prodigy

anyway, like it or not, this addiction has saved me many precious hours of racking my brain, trying to figure out the answer to life's burning questions like...

"what other movie have i see that actress in?"

"have nick & jessica made up yet?"

"who sang this song.....?"

etc. etc. etc. etc.

however, let it be known that i do realize that i have a problem, and i want all of those concerned to know that i am actively trying to prevent "sidekick thumb".

anyway, i've gotta go now....i think i just heard my tmail chime!

(listening to "Sleigh Ride" by Johnny Mathis... it's christmas people, give me a break!)

christmas....er... "holiday" rant

i'm SOOOOOOOOO over it! this will be brief, because i'm so ticked off, and am going to spin class to burn off all of this negative energy.

now let me just say that i'm not one of those "christians" that will complain about seperation of church and state, prayer in schools, etc. it's not that i don't care, i just happen to agree that there shouldn't be prayer in schools, yada yada. however, i AM sick and tired of people feeling like christianity is something that not only can be trashed, but that should be changed.

take for example this christmas....er... "holiday" season. apparently, it is a new trend for major stores (and now cities... i.e. orlando) to take Christ out of Christmas. well, i guess that i can't really say that, because it isn't even called "christmas" anymore. no crap. if you go to kmart, or target and ask for a "christmas" tree, they won't know where to tell you to look. however, if you tell them that you want a "holiday" tree, they'll know exactly where to direct you. same as in my fair city of orlando, or my husband's employer. don't dare call the ginormous tree in front of our city hall, or in the middle of the happiest place in central orlando, a "christmas tree". get it right, it's now a "holiday tree", people!

have we become SO friggin' politically correct that we can't even use the word "christmas" to commemorate this holiday? it's been called that since this country was founded! what's the harm? i would venture to say that most americans celebrate christmas, but why can't we call it what it is? does this mean that a menorah should only be refered to as a "candelabra" because it is too religious to call it the former?

however, i do want to make it known, that i understand why schools decide to label their winter holiday parties as that, "winter" or "holiday" party. there are too many religions that people are involved in, to celebrate them each with their own party.... i.e. christmas, hanukkah... and we certainly don't want childrene to feel left out. on the contrary, this is very different from changing the name of our holiday icon, just to appease people who might not celebrate the way that the majority chooses to.

also, while i'm ranting, i'm extremely fed up with stores like Urban Outfitters and the like, in their "Jesus" bashing. wether they perceive it as "bashing" or not, isn't for them to decide. Jesus soap on a rope, Jesus the action figure, Jesus is my homeboy t-shirts, are not meant to show support or appreciation for our Lord and Savior. no, i'm sure that they are mocking. there would be major hell to pay, should we ever mock Allah and the islamic faith, or hinduism in such a blatant way. what gives people the "right" to only focus on christians and our faith alone? "Jesusland" meaning all of the states that our President won in the last election. frankly, it's uncalled for.

as an american, i am using my voice (thank you forefathers) and my freedom, to speak in outrage against this ridiculousness. i am hurt, and furious. shame on us, for allowing "political correctness" to dictate our "holidays".


(listening to "Amanda Cecilia" by Elliott Smith")

october recap (part 1)

what an awesome month.

i don't feel like typing a ton... so this will basically be a pictoral of my monthly activities (with a few comments here and there).

e n j o y

October 11

Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween Party

i love me some candy!

kevin doing the "candy dance"

tinkerbell, is that you?

no! it's captain hook!

holy crap. i love halloween!!

tom, steph, and kevin... pre- pop explosion

Magic Kingdom Scary Singers

what a great evening with my friends!

October 12

Friendaversary!

kevin harrington and i met a year ago at epcot center through a mutual friend. we had an instant connection and have been good friends ever since that night. not only was he an awesome friend, but he has become a vital team member in interpreting the shows at disney.

the night that we met, we went to watch Kool & the Gang, who were there for the food & wine festival. when we heard that they were coming back again this year, we knew that we had to go and "celebrate".

here are a few pictures that helped to capture such a great time!

on our way...

"it's a celebration!"

"oh yes it's ladies night"

dancing our pants off!

me and my friend

Boston Terrier Meetup

Fleet Peeple's Park

after watching the other Boston Terriers in the water, polly was enticed to join them.

boston terrier meetup group

pumpkins!

here is the second part of the halloween post. scroll down for a look at pumpkins from halloween's past.

1980

this is the first picture that i have where i actually helped to design the face on the pumpkin. that is probably why it looks retarded.

improvement

as you can see, the pumpkin face has much improved over the previous pumpkin picture. it could be, that this was the year my mom started making us take turns at drawing the facial characteristics.

happy family pumpkin

ahhh... the perfect 1980's family picture. the pumpkin doesn't look that bad either. another year, another big improvement.

p.m.s. pumpkin carving

i don't know what my problem was, but obviously i was pissed off about something! paul looks happy, which means that he probably got to pick which part of the face he wanted to draw first. really, given the shape of the pumpkin, it doesn't look too bad!

the nightmare before christmas

in 1994, not only did tom come into my life, but also the most elaborate pumpkins that i have ever seen. this is the pumpkin which started it all.... "the nightmare before christmas". it makes my pathetic "sun" pumpkin look like the crap that it is. anyway, i remember tom spending hours making this pumpkin. it was truly a sight to be seen.

mortal kombat and the jackson 5

the following year, tom was addicted to playing "mortal kombat", so he decided to put the insignia on his pumpkin. however, i was addicted to the "jackson 5", and decided that "michael" (pre nose job, and child molesting) should go on mine. i cut out a huge afro and carved his face into the melon. i even had carved out the words, "jackson 5" on the top of the pumpking. i was so proud!

on halloween night, we were on my front porch passing out candy, and a woman came up, looked at my pumpkin and said, "oh look! they carved their last name into their pumpkin!" wha? no!!!! we weren't the jacksons!!!! couldn't she see the giant afro glowing in the moonlight? what an idiot.

goofy and cinderella's castle

again, tom's pumpkin is way better than mine....sigh. oh well, atleast i tried.

it

this was the last pumpkin that i made with my family before i got married. my mom was out of town (i think) and my dad and i had an evening at home and decided to carve this pumpkin while watching the movie, "it". what a great memory!

boob pumpkin & frankenstein

as soon as i saw this pumpkin, i knew that i had to buy it. when else would i ever find another pumpkin that looks like it has tiny breasts? my mom wouldn't let me use them for nipples, so i settled and used them for eyeballs.

isn't tom's pumpkin awesome? i swear, mine NEVER turn out this cool!

spider

i love this picture. tom and i carved this pumpkin for a halloween party that we were having with our friends from church. my fall display kicked-ass that year. ahhh yes, 2002, that's when i used to entertain and have people over. (something i haven't really done since moving to florida)

i love you

not my pumpkin, but wanted to put up a picture of it anyway. one of my students in my sign language class carved it for me as a thank you. it was so cool, that i just had to share it with all of you.

hope that you enjoyed my pumpkin post (even if it wasn't finished until the second week of november)!

check back for a recap of october!

(listening to "Thule" by The Album Leaf)

this is halloween!

i love halloween! i look forward to this day every year. this is my favorite holiday. i know, some might say, "what about Christmas, which celebrates Christ's birth?" i like that too. however, a whole day dedicated to dressing up, eating so much candy that your teeth instantly rot out, and having the crap scared right out of your colon, is so much fun!

thinking back to halloween's past, and reading betamike's blog, inspired me to share some of my cool (and not so cool) costumes and pumpkins.

let us begin the journey.....

"kkk christy"

boba fett, kkk christy, and a storm trooper

this is scary in more ways than one. first of all, i totally look like the spawn of a klansman. secondly, i was only two years old, so my parents are to blame for this offensive costume. this picture was taken of me in 1980. we moved to this neighborhood (where i grew up... my brother paul, now owns this house!) only two months earlier. i'm sure that the neighbors thought that my parents were whack-jobs. i'm sure that they're right. nobody in their right mind, would dress their child like this in 2005, unless you live in the sticks in the south and drive around with a confederate flag in the back of your pick-up.

"raggedy ann"

i especially wanted to include this one for you, betamike. here i am dressed as raggedy ann in one of those cheap plastic costumes from the grocery store. i'm sure that i picked it out, since i was getting to that age where you make choices that seem good at the time, but years later, you realize that they weren't. my mom tells me that she tried to talk me out of it, but i insisted, saying that all of my friends had costumes like it, and i wanted to be just like them. i've always been such a poser.

"gypsy"

i remember that this was my mom's idea, but i loved it. having always been a jewelry lover, i relished the idea of putting on an obscene amount of rings, bracelets, and necklaces. of course, not only did i get to wear jewelry, but i was able to finally wear makeup too. i love red lipstick....as you can tell.

"ballerina"

there was an older girl who lived down the street from me and she took ballet lessons. at this time, i wanted to be a ballerina when i grew up. she let me borrow two of her old recital costumes for halloween... one for the school halloween parade and party, and the other for trick-or-treating. however, being that it is always pretty chilly in ohio during the month of october, i had to wear a shaw over it. everytime i went up to someone's house, i had to take off my "wrap" so that they could see my costume. this was years before disney sold one to match the actual costume (i.e. cinderella, snow white, blah, blah, blah).

"princess diana"

i always loved princess diana. in second grade, i even had my hair cut to look like her's. i was such a dork. anyway, this is me in my princess di outfit. the only thing that i remember from this night, was that my necklace broke on someone's porch, and my dad patiently helped me to pick each one up, and put them into my candy bag. i was devestated, and he took a bad and embarrasing situation, and made it so sweet.

"hippie"

admittedly, this was a half-assed costume. i didn't really feel like dressing up. i really only wanted candy. (or maybe it was pms. check back at the next post for a looksy at my pissed-off carving experience.) like the perm?

(** there is somewhat of a time lapse here, as it was around this time that i would go to my friends houses for trick-or-treating. resulting in... no pictures! **)

"nelly sue"

originally, this costume was made as a joke with a friend. we created aliases and went out to a hick country restaurant, called.... are you ready..... 'Po Folks. no crap. not only could you buy a moonpie at the counter when you were paying your bill, but you could also drink from jelly jars underneath flowerpot light fixtures. yee haw!

"the wizard of oz"

a few years into our relationship, tom and i had decided that we were too old to trick-or-treat, so instead, we went to the church to pass out candy. we had a hard time deciding what to be.... finally deciding to be "dorothy" and "the scarecrow" from the wizard of oz. i bought some red flats from goodwill, and spent many painful hours hot-gluing red sequins onto them. ouch!

"catbat"

this is one of my favorite costumes. tom's sister was having a halloween party, and we were helping her to carve pumpkins and prepare for the festivities. i didn't have a costume, so i created "catbat" out of a headband and a cape. we enjoyed scaring the crap out of jenn and her friends. what a blast!

"gypsy #2"

ok. i know, it's pretty dumb to reprise an old halloween costume, however, this time it was for a good cause. there was a younger girl that lived on my parents' street, and she didn't have many friends, or siblings...so my mom volunteered me to go trick-or-treating with her. she wanted to dress up like me, so i decided that being a gypsy (again) would be the easiest costume. i love this picture. not only does it show off my yellow doc's, but also my skinny body!!!! i swear, i've never looked better. what the crap happened?

so there you have it. a short jaunt down memory lane of some of my finest (and not-so-finest) halloween costumes. * check back to the next post for pumpkins from halloween past!

* some costumes which i had, but unfortunately, don't have pictures of..... Robert Smith (The Cure), Jellyorum (Cats), Sunshine Christy, Mary Poppins, Mousketeer, and Kids Incorporated dancer

(listening to "Feel Good Inc." by Gorillaz)

petunia face

Petunia Face

polly is just as excited for halloween as i am. can't you tell? hee hee!

(listening to "We Didn't Do It" by Tegan & Sara)

christy reynolds?

look what comes up when you google "christy reynolds" under images! whacked.

(listening to "Fortress" by Pinback)

"elliott" (the turtle)

i don't know what it is about me.... if it is because i am soft-hearted (like my mama), or if i just have a really good eye, but i always seem to be able to find turtles in distress, and feel the need to bring them to safety.

since i have been living in florida, i have already saved three turtles from almost certain death. my most recent one being, "elliott", the ginormous turtle i saved on my street yesterday.

i was minding my own business, driving to the gym, when i drove past a turtle on the side of my street. i wasn't sure if he was alive or had "passed on", but i decided to stop anyway. as i approached him, i noticed that he was still alive, and needed to be moved, or would most likely be killed. the only predicament was how in the world could i get him to the lake? i had a bad experience when i was younger with a turtle in the car (that my mom, brother, and i were trying to save), so i didn't exactly want him to be next to me, even if that would have meant on the floor. so i decided that the trunk was the best bet.

i quickly cleared out my trunk, to make room for my
scared friend. as i was going to pick him up, a woman approached us on a walk with her dog, and told me that it was a hard-shelled turtle (of course! i have never known a turtle to not have a hard shell), and that she was glad i was saving it, because all animals should have a good chance at life.


when i approached him, he quickly went into his shell, though i could see that he had some extremely long claws...or nails, whatever. anyway, that made me nervous. i was afraid that he was going to start coming out of his shell when i picked him up, though he didn't, thank God. i did finally put him in my trunk, and quickly grabbed my Sidekick, so i could snap some pictures for this blog. yes, i am always trying to think of good things to write about!

anyway, i drove him to a nearby construction dump, that happened to be next to Turkey Lake. I quickly retrieved him from my trunk, and walked him all of the way down to the lake.

here, he started to feel comfortable enough to emerge from his shell, and hopefully, feel secure.

i named him "elliott", which seemed to be a much more mature sounding name compared to "tiger", the first turtle that i ever saved! funny how we sometimes give animals "people" names, especially named after our favorite singers. (another turtle that i saved a long time ago, was given the name "robert", after robert smith of "the cure".)

i hope that elliott lives many happy days in Turkey Lake, and that he manages to stay away from roads from now on.

"elliott" in his new home!

(listening to "Naked As We Came" by Iron & Wine)